"Something something something Dark Side. Something something something complete."

I recently watched much of Star Wars Episode IV with little Jerkface. As I was watching, I was also holding a rather upset little Mrs. Jerkface who is only 10 months old. As she was crying and squirming in my arms fighting off sleep, I realized that so much of what the Emperor says to Luke during Episode VI also applies to children... very grumpy children:

"By now you must know that your father can never be turned from the Dark Side. So will it be with you."

"As you can see, my young apprentice, your friends have failed."

"The alliance... will die. As will your friends. Good, I can feel your anger. I am defenseless. Take your weapon. Strike me down with all of your hatred and your journey towards the dark side will be complete! "

"I'm looking forward to completing your training. In time you will call *me* master. "

"You will find that it is you who are mistaken, about a great many things. "

"Come, boy, see for yourself. From here, you will witness the final destruction of the Alliance and the end of your insignificant rebellion."

"You want this, don't you? The hate is swelling in you now. Take your Jedi weapon. Use it. I am unarmed. Strike me down with it. Give in to your anger. With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant. "

"It is unavoidable. It is your destiny. You, like your father, are now mine."

"Good. Use your aggressive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you."

"Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the Dark Side."

"Young fool. Only now, at the end, do you understand."

"If you will not be turned, you will be destroyed."

"You have paid the price for your lack of vision."

"Yes, I assure you, we are quite safe from your friends here."

[After Luke says, "Your overconfidence is your weakness."] "Your faith in your friends is yours."

"And now, young Skywalker... you will die. "

Okay, maybe that last one was a stretch... for now.

*The title of this post comes from this video.

"I'm not much on speeches, but it is so gratifying to leave you in the mess you've made. You're screwed. Goodbye."

I've done some reading this last week on the claim that President Obama is unqualified for the office because he is not an American citizen. I won't take the time to rehash the arguments, but they are being pushed by the unfortunately named Dentist/Lawyer/Crackpot/Possible Alien Orly Taitz. Someone else equally as crazy, but not as hilarious has expressed many of the arguments here. (Note: why is it that all crackpot websites have terrible layouts and designs? How hard is it to take the time to draft a coherent narrative... oh, I said "coherent." My bad.) I've read the arguments and am sufficiently persuaded that they are baseless. But, being the troublemaker that I am, I started to think about the next level.

Let's assume for a moment that everything everyone says about President Obama's ineligibility is true, that he's not an American citizen, that he lied on every public document he's signed since then, that he's had several different names and social security numbers, and that he lied on his FEC filings when running for president. Let's assume that ab inicio, "President" Obama is ineligible for the office.

What now?

This is a question that I have not seen adequately addressed in anything that I've read. I see a couple of scenarios:

1. A lawsuit successfully challenges Obama's FEC filing, making its way to the Supreme Court, who then invalidates the filing, declaring the election invalid.

Outcome: What then? Who becomes President? Biden? His filing/candidacy was necessarily linked to Obama's, so isn't it invalid as well? Do we have another election? How is it conducted? Etc. Also, I don't think the Supreme Court has the Constitutional authority to reach this decision, but I'll touch on that below.**

2. The House of Representatives initiates impeachment proceedings, which move through the Senate resulting in Obama's removal from office.

Outcome: This is the most Constitutionally appropriate course of action. There are already procedures and precedents in place governing this possibility. Furthermore, the only branch of government which has explicit Constitutional authority to remove elected officials is the Senate. This outcome is highly unlikely given the fact that the Presiden and Congress are of the same party and seem to be getting along. This would also mean that Biden would become president. Is that really what you want, crazy birth-certificate people?

3. Through some government action, Obama is asked to step aside, or be removed, or whatever, but he doesn't. He takes over in a military coup and ushers in a socialist paradise. Hooray, comrades! Once Glenn Beck is working in a labor camp, he'll be able to cry for real.

*Note: I have yet to see a decent argument as to why Obama is not a natural born citizen by virtue of his Mother's citizenship. But that's the sort of "argument" that is accepted without question by the Obamabots who drink the Obama Kool-Aid and are loyal followers of the ObamaNation as reported by the Obamedia. I wish people would just start calling us "Obamaniacs". Like the "Propaniacs."

**Update 10/15/09: In a Georgia case, Attorney Taitz was sanctioned by the court for filing a frivolous lawsuit based on Obama's alleged ineligibility for presidency. Toward the end of its opinion, the court addresses the constitutional authority of the judiciary to decide the issue. To sum up: I was right. (Scroll down to page 23 to see the political question analysis, but read the rest for fun!)