Tuesday, August 25, 2009

"Something something something Dark Side. Something something something complete."

I recently watched much of Star Wars Episode IV with little Jerkface. As I was watching, I was also holding a rather upset little Mrs. Jerkface who is only 10 months old. As she was crying and squirming in my arms fighting off sleep, I realized that so much of what the Emperor says to Luke during Episode VI also applies to children... very grumpy children:

"By now you must know that your father can never be turned from the Dark Side. So will it be with you."

"As you can see, my young apprentice, your friends have failed."

"The alliance... will die. As will your friends. Good, I can feel your anger. I am defenseless. Take your weapon. Strike me down with all of your hatred and your journey towards the dark side will be complete! "

"I'm looking forward to completing your training. In time you will call *me* master. "

"You will find that it is you who are mistaken, about a great many things. "

"Come, boy, see for yourself. From here, you will witness the final destruction of the Alliance and the end of your insignificant rebellion."

"You want this, don't you? The hate is swelling in you now. Take your Jedi weapon. Use it. I am unarmed. Strike me down with it. Give in to your anger. With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant. "

"It is unavoidable. It is your destiny. You, like your father, are now mine."

"Good. Use your aggressive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you."

"Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the Dark Side."

"Young fool. Only now, at the end, do you understand."

"If you will not be turned, you will be destroyed."

"You have paid the price for your lack of vision."

"Yes, I assure you, we are quite safe from your friends here."

[After Luke says, "Your overconfidence is your weakness."] "Your faith in your friends is yours."

"And now, young Skywalker... you will die. "

Okay, maybe that last one was a stretch... for now.

*The title of this post comes from this video.

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