Le Spam

Lately, I've been getting a lot of spam comments. It's not an unmanageable number, so I'm not inclined to change my open comment policy. Plus, some of them are funny. One comment, touting the benefits of a "HYIP", or "high-yield investment program", started with the following line:

Hi there!
I would like to burn a theme at this forum.

A lot of people would annoyed by this spam offer, but I'm not. First, the commenter starts with a very peppy introduction. It's informal, personal, and full of energy (note the exclamation point). Second, he uses the awesome phrase "burn a theme". I don't know what that means, but I'm going to start using it. Third, and finally, he calls my blog a "forum". I'm touched. I thought that most forums required some critical mass of participation to be considered a forum, but I guess I was wrong. It's not to say that I'm not grateful to my few, but faithful followers (alliteration, baby!), it's just that only a handful of people in the world see fit to visit the home of my bizarre rants, so I didn't think I had risen to the level of a forum. But this noble spammer has provided independent validation of my blog as a forum, so now I am proud to say that I am a webmaster. (Not to be confused with a Moon Master.)

"The only industry in Hollywood without a soul is the music industry."

At long last, someone is suing "Avatar" for copyright infringement. It's a British Columbia man who claims he sent his copyrighted script to a bunch of studios, including Cameron's, for production. The lawsuit is pending in America's Hat, so it's not important, but the point is that someone is finally calling out Cameron on his story idea.

To which I say: get over yourself, hugger.

Let me begin by saying that I have not, and likely will not, see Avatar. I hated Titanic and I will never forgive Cameron for it. The coolness of Cameron's pre-Titanic movies comes close to saving him from the public flogging he so richly deserves. Not even his awesome alliance with the Laser Cats can save him. The fact that Titanic outgrossed Star Wars just sickens me and he can choke on his stupid Oscar forever.

Despite my bitterness toward Mr. Cameron and his mind-raping adventure, I have to disagree with Mr. Canadia's claim that he thought up "Avatar" before Cameron did. No sir, many, many people thought up Avatar before Cameron did, and even before you did. See, Mr. Canadia's screenplay was copyrighted in 1998. Let's take a moment and examine just a few examples of media that thought up this idea before then:

• Pocahontas - 1995
• Fern Gully - 1992
  
• Dances With Wolves - 1990
  
• Speaker for the Dead - 1986
• Dune (the movie) - 1984
  

I'm not saying that Cameron didn't rip off any of these works (he claims the movie is based on a dream he had), but rather, that these people all thought up this movie before you did, Mr. Canadia, so get in line.

Besides, Hollywood has been ripping off previous works since its inception. You're just one of thousands of people screwed by the dirty machinations of Hollywood. That doesn't make it right, but it also means that you're not special.